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pursuing the upward call with fear and trembling

just a 44 year old man seeking to share my meanderings with the world at large or the blogosphere at small

Sunday, November 23, 2008

Love Is Stronger Than Fear

I hope so. This is a title of a book by Peter Kreeft, it is something I want to believe. Belief seems to be fragile so much more than I once had thoughr as I find blogs of what is going on in peoples lives lately or for sometime regarding their beliefs, their faith. Some lives seem to begin and stay in turmoil that never ceases, such as though born in the Middle East or Africa. Some are born into privilege which stays with them and others have a varied mixture. Life experience plays a big part in forming beliefs when we are young, but it doesn't force a particular belief.

I am in a doggypaddling mode i think regarding faith and belief and what is what. I see that certain things like the questions I posed a few posts earlier are not as I had believed them to be. God gives us alot more freedom than i think has been taught through the ages since the time of the Protestant Reformation and then the rise of Premillennial Dispensationalism in the 1900's. One of the most famous sermons in history was by Jonathan Edwards called *Sinners In the Hands of An Angry God*. I have read where many people committed suicide after hearing this sermon or hearing about it so they would not end up falling away and committing sins which would damn them to hell. How crazy is that??? God is love, that is THE biggest identifying aspect of His character!!!! He says Himself that mercy triumphs over judgment,that we should forgive without end,that His kindness leads to repentance. If that is the case then how can the tremendous amount who hold to a belief that only the *elect* will be saved explain the contradiction here??? A God who Himself, since Jesus is the exact replica of God the Father incarnate, chose to die to save His creation that rebelled against Him, how can THAT God doom so many before they are even born because He chose to do so because He is sovereign or all -powerful???

I have talked so much about my struggles with fear,and i still don't have a full handle on it. I think anger lurks behind the fear. I really am at a loss for dealing with anger. I have embedded it way down deep for so long. I have not wanted to be angry, especially at God and people. I think I felt i should be against those who ridiculed and taunted me at times, but i was afraid of it getting out of control. i find now though, as i have for so long, anger comes out in various automatic thoughts or in silly ways. I yell at cars when i have to wait for a lil bit to make a turn. I get so frustrated when I make lil mistakes or drop things or stuff like that. I feel it turned inward as i know i made it so a long time ago as a way to handle it. I really don't know how to take it and feel it and let it go though. I have such a background in psychology and dealing with helping people handle their emotions and counseling them, yet i have such am inability to understand how to handle it myself.

i want love to be stronger than fear. I hope and pray I will do what i need to so that it is true in my mind,heart and action. Share freely any thoughts you have upon reading.


At 2:57 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Love and fear are both such powerful emotions, one positive, one negative. I'd like to believe that LOVE will always conquer FEAR.


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