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pursuing the upward call with fear and trembling

just a 44 year old man seeking to share my meanderings with the world at large or the blogosphere at small

Thursday, May 14, 2009

Thoughts

Emotions/feelings are interlocked with our thoughts & actions. What is it that *hurts our feelings*? When we get scolded or chastised by a parent or authority figure,when someone is disappointed in us or ridicules us. Attitude. Is faith basically an attitude w/action & feeling??

Self is what blocks us from God. Everythingto do with self. God is always present,whether we believe,feel or think He is or not. We *experience* Him as being non-existent though if we don't believe in Him or don"t exercise faith. How do you get past being controlled by your feelings?? Can you experience the joy of Gods Spirit even if your feelings are messed up??

How do you get to the point where you are doing all you do as you live life to the glory of God & seeking His Kingdom & His eighteousness first? What is His Kingdom & His righteousness??

Fear is caused by threat of punishment & pain. Sin causes this to happen. God hates sin & judges it. Conscience is sensitized & ironclad about violating basic right/wrong. How do I take in His perfect love & have it cast out all fear???

What is full repentance???

Just a myriad of thoughts i wrote free-association style and decided to post as is. Hope to get responses.

4 Comments:

At 9:47 PM, Blogger jennypo said...

Wow, Robert - just one of these questions would have been enough to start something! I don't want to be trite and reduce this all to a list, but I'll share my experiences with each of these questions:

Is faith basically an attitude w/action & feeling??
- Faith is the refusal to deny what you know of the truth, even when it costs. It is utterly aside from feeling. Feeling is often what drives us away from faith, but as faith is exercised, feeling follows.

Can you experience the joy of Gods Spirit even if your feelings are messed up??
Yes, because it goes much deeper inside than feelings do. Eventually, though, the joy of God's Spirit will spread to infect even feelings, to the extent that we allow the Spirit freedom in us.

How do you get to the point where you are doing all you do as you live life to the glory of God & seeking His Kingdom & His eighteousness first? What is His Kingdom & His righteousness??
When I was a kid, my friend had a Snoopy mug that said "to know me is to love me". God is like that. Getting to know him prompts the growth of love for Him, which is what motivates a seeking of His kingdom and His righteousness. His kingdom is His being king - in me, since that is what I have the most control over. His righteousness is his clean-ness - I seek that clean-ness and God's rule in myself and long for its spread throughout the universe.

Conscience is sensitized & ironclad about violating basic right/wrong. How do I take in His perfect love & have it cast out all fear???
God's love and His hatred of sin can only be reconciled with a casting out of fear when I realize that God's love for me is what results in his desire to destroy sin in me. When I admit my sin AND choose for him to deal with it in me, I can rest in the comfort that his love, while it may not be comfortable, will work in me to remove sin and keep it from destroying me. I need not fear God when I choose him above the sin that besets me, nor need I choose sin, which I can trust him to deal with. It may be at a cost, but that cost is less painful and less destructive than sin. To a child who fears the doctor, it may be preferable to stay home, but we don't need to fear - we can take comfort in the fact that God won't let us be ruled by our fears - he will take us to the doctor. And as we experience healing, even that fear will subside.

What is full repentance???
The bowing of my will before God; the willingness to be changed, in spite of the cost and my feelings.

To turn my will toward God because I know that He is Good - knowing that it will hurt, but acting in recognition of my knowledge of Him rather than my turbulent emotions and my fear of pain - this is freedom and healing from the destruction of sin.

...a paradox, in a way, since the way out of destruction lies through a lesser destruction, and the way most directly toward it lies in running away.

 
At 5:43 AM, Blogger Aphra said...

Wow. That was quite a good comment. I'm not sure I have much to add!

I think it all seems to have a lot to do with control. If we are in control, then when people say negative things to us, we take it personally. But if God is in control, then we can blame Him :P
I guess it comes from having where our security lies.
Fear relates to control as well- we tend to fear things that we can't control.

That's what came to mind first anyway. Good questions!

 
At 6:29 AM, Blogger Becky said...

http://www.flowerdust.net/

found this: and found it relevant for me SHAME keeps me from repentance.....

Shame is a sickness…

A disease…

That keeps us hidden.

The remedy for shame is grace.

Grace that requires you to step aside when you know you’re right.

Grace that requires you to consider others better than yourself.

Grace that hurts and is dangerous.

Someone around you needs that grace right now.

Go give it.

And give it freely.

 
At 10:46 PM, Blogger Robert said...

Jennypo- you can never be trite lol I really like all you shared in your responses, especially the paradox of going towards a painful choice which is the only way to get past the pain. Feelings have gotten in the way for me of letting faith just rest in Him. Sure wish you had email :)

Aphra- very insightful thoughts you have. I think fear and control are allied together alot as well, and letting go of control is a huge part of faith.

Becky- you share some very powerful realities of grace. I want to do just as you say-give grace freely and openly.

 

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