reality and illusion

C S Lewis is truly one of the most prolific authors to have put pen to paper, and he does a remarkable job of telling tales to bring fiction into a reality-based setting. The Screwtape Letters is one of his more brilliant works, as he develops characters in the form of 2 demons who message back and forth in devising more devious,nefarious ways in which to confound christians from following and obeying Christ and the leading of the Spirit. I think satan can arguably be called the greatest magician and hypnotist of all time. He never ceases to divert our attention away from what is real into what is smoke and mirrors. He lulls us into a trance where we become oblivious to what is real and true only to pursue what is fake and illusionary.

Idolatry is one of the most grievous sins we commit against Almighty God. It's easy to look at the Israelites and the incident with the golden calf and to think we would never do such a thing..... but in reality of course we do. Our idols just have more glossy veneer, such as power,fame,affluence,lust,workaholism,and so on. *the grass is always greener* is an illusion that seems to happen over and over, no matter how many times we discover it just isn't so.
In my psychology classes i took in college , one of the first dynamics we learned was about attitude. There is what happens to us and then what we think/feel about what happened to us. The second often is truly more important than the first. How we percieve the impact of events upon us affects our actions far more than the actual occurrence of things in themselves. Adam and Eve had the perfect idyllic environment to live in as well as a perfect realtionship with God. They chose to violate that perfection in hopes of something better..... following an illusion a lie. I slap myself mentally so often because i find myself chasing mirages just the same way as they did. Why??? I scan across the blogosphere and see how often we as a collective whole are constantly berating ourselves for again chasing after things other than God. Why?? I am being rhetorical in the asking of why here. There are times when God and His love , grace , peace and majesty are just so prevalent and geuine to us we just bow and repent seeking to worship Him in total praise and gratitude. All to quickly though, we find ourselves seeking pleasure relief satisfaction or release in a variety of other ways. What is it that lurks so deeply inside and can cause us to lose sight in such a short time span of the awesomness of belonging to and enjoying relationship with our Creator Awesome Holy God????

Sin...... self-centered.... i want what i want when i want it and i want it right now!!!! I me myself and I..... ego self and all the other synonyms you care to use for it. We want to be god..... we want to call our own shots releive our pain make things run according to our desires and whimsy. I have just finished leading a Sunday school class on Galatians in my church. Onr of the key teachings made by Paul in the letter is that we are to be crucified with Christ. Dead to the world and the world dead to us. Yes, amen of course we all want that. Really????? pain, excruciating pain, selfless, seeking always Gods interests and those of others. Giving up our personal set of *rights* and not caring whether we recieve attention or acclaim at all. Living life totally focused on Gods will and His desires, seeing everthing and everyone as he does. I write these thoughts and just shiver inside seeing how far from living this out i am, and how I so quickly run from carrying it out. wanting some kind of shortcut some easier way. I am compelled by His Word however. To want to seek to willingly accept what He calls me to. To enter into His pain and realize he will be there always no matter how much satan or my flesh try to tell me otherwise.

God is love..... God is good...... God wants all of us to know to the very marrow of our bones just how intensely He loves us, to reflect on the price he paid to show us how much He loves us. I pray i will pursue these calls to surrender to Him more and more with a heart that wants to thirst and hunger for God till i am satisfied by nothing else but Him.

1968 poignant year

I went and saw the movie *Bobby* today. it is done in a very robert altman type style, lots of sub-plots involving various characters all surrounding the main character bobby kennedy. The movie was written by emilio estevez and i thought he did a surprisingly good job. Ashton kutcher has a small but very interesting role as does his wife demi moore. i really liked the movie and it just made me think back to what our country and the world was like in 1968.

I was only 7 in 1968, but i can recall so much of what was going on back then after seeing the movie and how it included events that were happening at the time. It was an election year and LBJ declared he would not seek reelection as president, largely due to his involving us even deeper in the VietNam war. Civil rights movement had made major strides in changing racist laws and practices throughout the country but then Martin Luther King Jr was assassinated. Riots broke out in several major cities. I was living in New Jersey at the time and my dad was a cop in Irvington, a city right next to Newark, one of the major riot areas. Farm workers were protesting unfair treatment and wages, colleges and universities were filled with political protest and anti-america sentiment due to the war. The death of MLK Jr was a shockwave to all the hope and progress that had been seen to be happening across the country. Bobby Kennedy was seen by so many as the last shining hope for change to keep moving forward and to create a better world. Watching the movie, listening to speeches they put in of actual video showing the real bobby kennedy as he was campaigning you could just feel the excitement and support so many people felt for him. His speech at the Ambassador Hotel in california where he was solidifying his winning the democratic nomination for president was incredibly moving. Before you knew it.... BANG........ bobby is shot mortaqlly wounded all the excitement instantly turns to hysteria, disbelief and hopelessness. JFK, MLK Jr, and now Bobby........ the dream seen by so many seemed to have died.

I watched the movie and could envision myself as older in 1968 and feeling the passion and hope displayed by so many for kennedy. He spoke of ending violence, seeking peace, helping the poor and destitute. He spoke of the USA as being a nation that was sacrificial, caring,giving strong and seeking what was good right and true. i couldn't help but think back to our last election. Red states,blue states, country so polarized and divided, national unity that happened after 9/11 all but disintegrated.

i can't help but wonder how our world would be different had MLK Jr and Bobby Kennedy lived and carried out their dream and vision. So much of what they stood for seems to reverberate within the pages of the Bible. parable of the Good Samaritan, Jesus saying if you give anyone a cup of cold water you have given it to Him, visiting prisons, helping poor and widows, the sick and needy. Those are NOT conservative/liberal issues they are SPIRITUAl LIFE issues!!!! Being a conservative republican, i have experienced a lot of distress these past six years. Seeing this movie, hearing Bobby kennedys speeches, seeing the discourse on so many blogs and the vitriol tossed to and fro about President Bush and his administration. i still hold to my stance, however i definitely have a newfound appreciation for what i see as the real core values of democrats. NOT approving abortion, homosexuality and drug usage. But, improving the environment, building community across all racial,ethnic and socioeconomic lines and seeking a means to peaceful attempts at ending conflicts as opposed to military and violent ones. I just think more and more Jesus shows us how He transcended ANY attempt to pigeonhole Him politically. I would love to see Him appear and bring Focus on the Family, Sojourners,NAE,UMC,Pope and a few others and just let them all know ... *guys, none of you have gotten it right, you all have a log in your eye trying to remove splinters from others. Love, not politics, is the way to reach people. may we all learn more and more exactly how to live out His command to love one another every single day!!!

suffering sacrifice and service

I took an online course 2 years ago from a ministry called *Becoming Who God Intended* The course basically covered every aspect of Chrisitianity and focused on the Trinity and the relationship God desired us as His creation to have with Him. Our identity in Christ and connected to the Father and Holy Spirit was driven home and many examples were discussed showing how Jesus brings into His family and gives us the perfect love ,acceptance and grace we don't fully experience in our human families due to dysfunctional issues caused by our fallen natures and all the residue from having basic selfish, sinful attitudes which fight within us on a constant basis.The course delved into understanding the nature of sin and how we are set free by the Holy Spirit. Sin is way more than just doing a wrong act it is a complete maze of powerful moods and desires inner pain that seeks satisfaction from carrying out selfish actions and motivations to bring relief and anesthetize the pain we face.

My title of this post is reflecting on Jesus life and purpose in His role as Messiah, Lord and Savior. The Old Testament had many prophecies concerning the Messiah and His character and nature, Isaiah is one of the primary books in which the prophecies are contained and in which we can look back after reading the Gospels and discover their fulfillment. That Messiah would be a suffering servant and sacrifice His life are all vividly portrayed in Isaiah. In thinkingabout the growing amount of believers who are leaving or turning away from the institutional church I was reminded of how that course pointed out that we as His floowers were to reproduce the life of Christ in our own lives. Everything Jesus experienced as He was here He seeks to have us reduplicate ourselves, not necessarily in a literal physical way but on a very spiritual/emotional relational way.

He suffered rejection by friends and family, as well as strangers and even those who were supposed to be the ones waiting for Him the most!! He suffered physically, went hungry, homeless and was lonely as well. Anytime we go through times in life such as these, we have His example to rely upon as well as the Spirit to empower us and the Father to pray to to pour out our hearts too. He sacrificed Himself for us all, and calls us to show that trait as we live out our lives. Service was His modus operandi especially notable as He washed His disiples feet and fed the crowds that came to hear Him teach and seek healing from Him.

I just want to make these 3 attributes more and more a visible activity in my mind thoughts feelings and actions. I get caught up in selfpity over mistakes and sins i committed in the past or bad things that others did to me or i had happen and how they hurt me. Or i dwell on worrying how Ai may mess up ad fail Him in the future because i see or feel so much lacking as opposed to where i want to be or the measure stick Scripture calls me too. I need to live in the present and accept when i suffer, He is in it with me, giving me His Spirit to lead and guide me through, even with all my flaws and struggles. To be a servant no matter what is happening w hether good or bad and to know He chose to be a servant, even though He was God in flesh King of Kings and Lord of Lords...... He wanted to be the lowest of the low and found great joy as well as delighting His Father.

I think about these things and i want to make them become as natural as breathing, not even thinking about it just having it happen. So to easily distracted by the flesh and all that comes with it. I think those parts of Christianity who teach and preach that real christians experience wealth health and total victory all the time do the MOST damage to real discipleship. I see genuine lovers of Christ and people who endure great pain and loss all across the globe in every country, and who often are struggling with personal crises of fear, doubt and despair....... not due to lack of faith but just the burden of life and its weariness when the weight of its fallenness just keeps crashing down. Theology can seem dry and pointless at times when in the center of the tornado BUT it is the glimmer that points us to how we find relief and rest, even as the tornado lifts us up and throws us around...... THIS is what i want to have more and mnore of and pray the same for all of us as we seek to make sense of our lives in whatever condition they may be in. Grace and peace to all!!!!

Bible and personal experience

Post-modernism is the age we afre in now. When attempts are made to define what exactly is meant by post-modernism, usually reference is made to a more hands-on, experiential,relational mode of being. This is good,getting away from strictly rationalistic,intellectual dispassionate style of modernism. A dilemma i see happeining as I scan across the land of blogdom is that so many seem to want to discard the authority and infallibility of the Bible. Thos who adhere to a high view of Scripture are even looked at as idolaters making the Bible an object of worship in and of itself.

The Bible has been attacked and scorned throughout history. Countless attempts have been made to discredit it, silence it and make it meaningless......... all have failed. The Bible doesnt not claim to be Gods absolute Word just for kicks. Jesus declares the absolute infallibility and authority of Scripture and He was referring to the Old Covenant Law,Psalms and Prophets. The Apostle Paul echoes Jesus words in I Timothy when he states *all Scripture is inspired by God and authoritative for reproof and instruction in righteousness* The Bible is objectively written, by many different men of all kinds of backgrounds over a vast difference in time periods. NO WAY could this book possibly maintain its cohesiveness and symmetry throughout unless God authored it... simply impossible to happen.

Personal experiences are a very important part of our lives as believers, energizing us and directing us to carry out the call God has placed inside each one of us. BUT..... we all have subjective and varied experiences and sometimes not all are in line with Gods leading, because we still struggle with our sinful nature even as believers. The Bible serves as the measuring stick with which to balance our experiences to see if they match up with Gods will. If we discount the authority of the Bible, we lose any grounding with which to know whether we are following God or not. All of us have experiences and emotions, no matter what our belief paradigms. If there is no objective revelation from God, anyone can claim to have the 8truth8 for themselves, and many do, relativism being one of the biggest hurdles challenging Christianity today. Tom Cruise claims scientology is the 8truth8 for him. The leader of iran claims Islam is the *truth* Countless others claim there is no absolute truth, that we all create truth ourselves, and thus act as our own gods. See the dilemma??? The Bible is not necessarily simple to understand. However, it is literature and if we know and understand the various genres of literature it contains then understanding becomes that much easier. The Bible interprets the Bible another key principle. Taken as a whole all Scripture ties together when understood that way. Anyone can come up with all kinds of heresy and craziness if they just focus on one book one verse or any combination that distorts the whole.

i hope this doesnt sound like a wooden rant. I just get very uneasy when i see a growing number of believers seeming to downgrade the power,truth and authority of Gods Word. If it loses its identity, how can we trust Jesus is who He claims to be???? Its He who we discover within the Bibles pages and He who declares it to be Divinely Inspired. Hope to hear feedback.

More Than Skin Deep

I am a bit perturbed tonight there is a fun word. We have a thing at my work called *personal best* a wellness/exercise type program which is very cool since we are a medical/dental insurance co and promote health and well-being...... all good. Well, today our president gave a pep talk to the whole company encouraging us all to exercise and work out even had a local gym come to sign people up as members. Excellent all for it!!!

The thing that irks me is an attitude i percieved from people that you are somehow deficient if you are not going to a gym or exercising regularly. i am a bit sensitive to this issue because I am one who doesn't exercise often, but i do not think that in itself should be a checkpoint to judge my value as a person. This is kind of an addendum to posts i have made before about physical appearance. Who doesn't want to be in top shape and looking good and attractive??? Certain factors happen in life which create roadblocks to achieving those desires though. I think back to grade school. I have flat feet, always have had them, they make it hard for me to jump because i have no arch to get lift with. I also had an unusual gait or walk and especially when i ran it looked alot like a duck waddling. i also was very tall for my age in grade school and took a long time developing my coordination. i managed just fine with these limitations, was able to play sports and do quite well usually. The thing is though there were always many who seemed to focus and see my physical struggles as opposed to seeing me.

i had this happen again in jr high.. when i developed a severe case of acne. i was brand new to my school and city having just moved to california from new jersey and of course still had an accent. My acne was the only thing many of those kids saw when they saw me. Of course this kind of stuff happens universally no matter where you live but i am just illustrating my point. In the church I joined shortly after becoming a christian when i was 16 it was a upper middle class church as far as the mix of people. Majority of them wore very expensive clothes and thought it was an essential part of the makeup of being a church member...... wear your best for the Lord. Nothing wrong with that really, unless it becomes a law and excludes any who might not have the money nor fashion desire to wear the best clothes. I was told to change my clothes style after becoming involved in working with youth there because i would not reach the kids if i wasn;t dressed as they were. i even had a friend who was college age.... a few years later tell me people would not even take time to get to know me or want to know me because i wasn;t dressed accordingly!!!! SAY WHAT???!!!???

I really am not seeking to make this a whine-fest or a pity party in any way shape or form. I just do not like that ,even among christians, its our physical appearance that gets focused on. Experiencing rejection,verbal and physical abuse directly because of how we look is THE real reason so many choose to NOt work out or take better care of their bodies. Once someone does lose weight and firm up does that change them really?? makes them alot nicer to the eyes as well as very healthy and benefits in that regard no question,,,, but i just think our value should be no LESS even if we stay fat and out of shape our whole life.

I appreciate all feedback and to see how this sits with all who read it. Again, I am NOT trying to promote laziness and being a couch potato or hopeless slob... I Am seeking to say none of us should have our worth based on this which ultimately squelches any motivation to CHANGe and become active exercisers because of the rejectiun and sense of shame.

Thank you whoever passes thru :)

pain is Gods megaphone

This was quoted by my worship/music minister at our commission meeting last night. Similar thoughts had been marinating within my cranium on and off for sometime. Pain... is there any other subject that has been more pursued,written about,fought against,chased after for understaning and ad infitum??? Countless books have been written dealing with pain. Why does a good God allow pain and suffering??? How do we deal with pain how do we avoid it?? is there a purpose behind it??? is it a cruel joke played on us which never gives the punchline???

Peter seems to have given a very *cut-to-the-heart* rendering of this dilemma regarding pain when Jesus was telling the 12 about His coming death and resurrection. After sharing how he was to be betrayed and suffer Peter immediately tried to tell Jesus he would not let it take place. Jesus nstantly rebuked him and showed the disparity between how God views pain and how humans view it. Peter wanted to avoid it, keep it from happening. Jesus saw it as essential and all within the framework of the Father's Will.

Crucified with Christ... used by paul a few times to describe our condition as believers. Best i can tell, crucifixion is painful. Fellowship of His sufferings...... paul talks of this in Philippians where he is discussing the surpassing value of losing all things in order to gain Christ. A central theme to gaining Christ, that absolute intimacy, is via pain and suffering. Scripture is abundant in sharing throughout that closeness to God involves PAIN!!!

So........... why do we try our best to run as far from it as we can and sedate ourselves or medicate or do anything there is to keep it away???? PAIN IS NOT FUN!!!! Pain is tough, it is draining, it is exhausting and uncomfortable and a whole host of other stuff that makes us want to keep it at a safe distance. Still, pain draws us close to GOD!!!! He sees it as no big deal. He also sees it a lot more seriously than we do. he saw it as important enough He chose to leave His abode in eternity take on human form experience everything we do and even allow Himself.... WILLINGLY...... to be tortured, killed by his own creation in order that He could overcome the ULTIMATE pain.... death..... and give us all victory and restored life in fellowship with Him.

where is God when I hurt???? Where is He in catastrphes and disasters???? Doesn't He care about my pain???? How can He allow this??? So like peter....... I have struggled with wanting to avoid pain as long as i can remember. I think God has begun to pierce through my fog to let me take in His answer to these queries...... He IS....... He was on the cross...... He is always present at all times in all situations in the midst of ALL pain we all experience He took and takes our pain and wraps us up in Himself calling us to trust Him as he lets us share pain with Him. He is at the core of the pain loving us and bringing us as close to Him as we can get.

Death must happen before resurrection. Pain must happen before we truly know His love life and joy. Father God thank you for Your incredible patience in leading me to know You and Your ways and bringing me to walk in faith trust hope and love. Help me to praise You and trust You anytime pain comes my way Place Your love and grace in my heart as deep as it can go so i will surrender my fear my resistance and my selfcenteredness and accept Your Will..... perfect love and grace You are a amazing all powerful beyon words awesome GOD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Sunday School.... helpful ideas wanted

I head up a commission in my church for Sunday School, both children and adult. We had our meeting last night and experienced a general frustration at the low rate of attendance by both kids and parents. We have a good committed group of teachers for both levels. The classes and curriculum are good quality, but for some reason alot of adults with kids choose not to come which means their kids don't come. I thought i would throw out a plea for any of you out there involved in a church, how is your sunday school running??? Do you have any creative things you do to make it more appealing??? We have 2 services 8:30 and 11"00 Sunday School is from 9:45 to 10:45. I just would greatly appreciate any feedback, especially from any of you pastors or SS teachers out there. Thanks for reading!!!

kidney stone- OUCH!!!!

I now have a small inkling of what you incredible women go through while enduring 9 months of carrying a new life inside you. I began having sharp,stabbing pain near my right kidney last night. I hoped they would lessen or cease but to no avail. I eventually called my sister kathy and she came over and drove me to a local emergency room. Kidney stone OWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!!!!! I was lucky to have a very fun and kind nurse who gave me instant relief from an IV of morphine PRAISE GOD FOR PAINKILLERS!!!! i also got to have a very good time talking with kat. Now of course i ALWAYS have a great time anytime i spend with my sweet incredible sister lol but having her there while I was recovering was just very cool. I am sorry I didnt call her sooner-it was midnight when i called her- but it was a very good time and just made me even more thankful for how God has worked in our lives and brought us along through different paths to knowing Him.

As i was waiting for kat to come pick me up and take me to the emergency room i just prayed a lil prayer if foe any reason I was taken that I would be resting before Jesus as soon as i went. I wish it didn't take physical pain and such to focus on being with Him....sometimes it just seems that is how we, or at least I am suddenly reminded of how He is ALWAYS present doesn't matter if we feel Him in any special way or whatever is happening around or within us... HE IS PRESENT!!! I am enjoying being painfree now and have my precious percocet meds in case lol but even more grateful HE holds me and helps me to realize deeper and deeper that He always will!!!!

Fun Questions

I am borrowing this from my buddy barbara as well as many others I'm sure!!! She likes to post interesting questions fairly often which help us all know each other better. I wanted to toss out a few which hopefully are fresh and new.

First.. what song would you choose to label yourself by??? can be more than one.

If you were an animal.... which one would you be and why???

if you were a cartoon character/superhero which one would you be and why???

I did this on NACR forum a year or so ago and it got a very lively response hopefully many will pass by here and decide to join in should be fun Just a lil on the *lighter side* :)

faith and love

A very good discussion has been going on last few days on a friends blog, started out based on the little campus crusade diagram of fact-faith-feelings as a train. Always great to have alot of varied thoughts and ideas shared together. Just how do we experience God??? How do faith/facts/feelings all interact in our lives as we connect to God???? How do they interact in the life of those who have no stated connection to God or claim he doesn't exist for there to even be any connection???

Relativism is such a huge philosophical way of thinking/believing in our world right now. Truth is what you want itto be, we each can have our own truths, what's true for you isn;t necaessarily true for me or anyone else- and that's fine!!!! This is a very popular way to talk but it sure breaks down in realistic fashion. If i hold a pot of boiling water over your head and tell you i want to pour it on you because i believe it wont hurt you...... i wonder if you would sit still and smile saying o yea go ahead after all that is *your truth*!!!!! Silly lil analogy i know, but hopefully makes a point. i once had a discussion with a coworker who believed there were no absolutes. I proceeded to tell him that his assertion was an absolute statement. GOTCHA!!!

This hit at me inwardly when i reflect on God,Jesus, Holy Spirit and the Bible. If they are not absolute then what is there for us to have any solid footing for being assured of something true and real??? God opens the Bible..... *In the beginning God*...... ok so.... what about before the beginning????? Come on God.... lets hear the *rest of the story*. Where did YOU come from???? God's answer to that inquiry.... * I AM THAT AM*. Certain questions are not ours to be privy to knowing the answer to this side of eternity. The Bible makes very specific claims Jesus absolutely claimed to be God in flesh... Messiah Lord and Savior. Like Josh McDowell said so astutely in his classic book Evidence That Demands A Verdict..... Jesus is one of 3 things Liar.... Lunatic.... or Lord. He does NOT leave open the option of being a good man, great teacher or philosopher. Sorry about that folks but no one gets crucified for being merely a *good man* If Jesus is NOT who He claimed to be and did NOT ride from the dead.... well like Paul says in 1 Corinthians we are all dead in our sins life is folly!!!

The main point being that it MATTERS that the Bible IS Gods infallible,authoritative WORD!!! Understanding how to interpret it and relate it to our lives is a big key. The Bible is not always meant to be taken literally. A point was made in the discussion about Paul instructing women about being silent in the church or about how they dress. Since we practice things diferently now it makes the Bible fallible. Wrong answer!!! Context... audience relevance that command was specific to those women at that time. Context, context ,context!!!!!

I'm sorry if this is way too long, just some thoughts i wanted to share. if you have read this far, by all means please comment on your take ALL comments welcome agree disagree whatever..... anyand all who stop by feel welcome. i sure hope so anyhow.

Mr Spock Dr Mccoy Jesus

Now wouldnt this be a lively dinner conversation!!! I have been perusing through various blogs and the subjects of intellect/emotion have been the source of much discussion on many of them, in various forms. I myself have often wished to be like Spock, completely rational,logical not letting emotion affect me. Spock always looks so in control, so free from pain. Then there is *Bones* Mccoy so full of raw emotion, pouring out his guts whenever faced with a tough situation or when he sees one of his friends in trouble or hurting. The 2 characters were always at odds so much of the time, fighting from their respective vantage points. I can still hear Mccoy yelling at Spock... *why you inhuman, green-blooded monster....* and Spock arching that eyebrow calmly retorting... *Careful Dr your emotions will be your undoing* Oh man what fun to watch!!!!

Isn't that alot like how our insides operate??? A part of us wants to rationally sort things out with another part just screaming and aching to show how we feel about it???? One or the other seems to take predominance usually. The scales tip one direction or the other, no balance. Jesus perfectly balances!!!! I often wished the shortest version in the Bible wasn't *Jesus wept* but Jesus laughed. Just to have a direct reference to show He enjoyed humor and had fun and showed it. Jesus really does show His sense of humor throughout the Gospels though. So many of the comments He makes to the disciples, as well as to the scribes and pharisees oh definite humor in there. Looking closely though I can see how He keeps the tightrope still in showing His mind and His heart as He deals with those He encounters, whether it be individuals or the masses. So much marinating inside so many people sharing their souls reaching out so we can connect to each other taking the risk of rejection or acceptance. I wonder if Spock would be put into a quandary if he met Jesus???? Something tells me the small human part of him would just end up welling up with raw emotion from the perfect love of jesus as well as His grace and truth. Mccoy???/ Hardheaded irishman would want to just take Jesus and enjoy being in His presence, even offer him a drink as they sat down and relaxed. LOL I pray for Jesus balance to become more and more deeply rooted within myself, grace/truth centered in love.

emotional bonding

Heavy hearts today concerning the whole ted haggard fiasco. So many varied opinions inevitably abound, whether it be christians pagans or whoever. The timing is very odd considering how played up the whole anti same sex marriage bills have proliferated throughout the country. I dont know much about ted haggard but it seems he may have exuded a lil *self-righteous* attitude according to some posts i have seen surfing around the blogosphere. Hopefully he will be cut to the heart and humbled in a genuine way which will draw him to know and realize the love and grace of God in a much more profound way than he has serving as sr minister of a mega-church or being leader of NAE. I just hope he doesnt get dicarded and thrown aside as trash because of his fall. The church all too often not only shoots it wounded but also relishes in tearing them apart and making sure they know just how bad they are. *There but for the grace of God go I* really needs to reverberate within each of us as we witness this tragic event.

My friend barbara posted recently about so many wounded hurting people in the world. So many wondering where to turn, what hope there is, where is God, where is Jesus???? It made me think of the title of my post. Do we, as the *church*..... really develop emotional connectedness with each other????? Do we take time to invest so a bond can be formed??? I think the answer all too often is we dont. Our culture is a rapid pace *fast food* nation. Hard enough to manage to sit through a 45 minute worship service and possibly then an hour long sunday school class. We feel rushed,pressured,driven to hurry and get lunch, catch up on leftover work chores and who knows what. The *one anothers* of the Bible are so important in thinking about this lack we seem to suffer. Love one another, pray for one another,serve one another ,bear one anothers burdens,encourage one another and confess your sins to one another. WOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!! can you imagine???? Look at all of those man what depth of emotion in all of them!!!! What energy we could infuse each other with by carrying these out???? Fighting ourown sinful natures as well as the predominance of *me first* in our world..... sure makes doing these quite a challenge but hey Jesus knew we would have major challenges when He made us His body.

choice and force part 2

had to add a few more thoughts to these key concepts. I had to chuckle at brians comment leaving a few *choice* words not that he was *forced* to by any means :) I have been thinking about the differences in personality and temperament we all have. Especially extroverts and introverts it can seem and feel like we are forced into a certain way of being as how we express ourselves. We can choose a different way but it often feels like what happens like when you put your shoe on the wrong foot sure you can try and make it fit but it wasnt meant to go there so it is with these polar opposites i think.

Spiritually i am still very hung up on the whole hyper-calvinism thing, probably because on bad days it can play bad mindgames with my head. OUCHIE!!! Some calvinists say God has chosen and predestined the *elect* to salvation as well as the *non-elect* to hell. Force is the key factor because the *elect* dont choose, God prechose for them. This whole notion really flies in the face of the whole idea of love and being *Bride of Christ* as well as Gods desiring *all men to be saved* as well as how Scripture is abundant in stories of God seeking out those who are lost so they can be found. If the Holy Spirit forces me to believe just because He wants me too..... that doesnt sound like being human it sounds more like a robot just my take on all that.

So many choices we are to make in life. even the ability to choose not to choose lol Force comes into play as well forced to handle our bodies,pay our taxes,work,handle relationships and on and on....... like my sis pointed out God always gives us a CHOICE we can choose to ignore Him we are FORCED to deal with the consquences of that choice amazing how much these 2 seem to go hand in hand isnt it???? Please comment more if you think about other ways you see these 2 affecting life as you live it.